Recently, I had a deep conversation with a friend of mine, who expressed some of the challenges she’s facing being in a relationship. As she spoke, I couldn’t help but notice how much she stressed on her insecurities in that relationship, especially now that she feels that her partner keeps sending mixed signals.

The chords of mixed feelings are always accompanied with confusion and can sound like this: He or she said and promised this, but did another or sometimes did the opposite. He or she was caring, sweet and attentive at the beginning, but then something changed or went wrong. He or she used to text me every day, now it is different … we’ve been seeing each other for months, but I don’t really know how he or she feels about me now.

This is a clear example of what I call mixed signal. The message is never clear. Sincerely, this can be frustrating and mind-blogging if you had tough experiences from your past relationships, or if this was one of your fears of getting into a relationship.

Fact is, when you find yourself in situations like this, you tend to develop negative thoughts and presumptions. This is because you have lost those positive vibes and energy that kept you going earlier on.  It is at this point your subconscious start picking up on things that you don’t exactly want to admit to yourself or maybe to others.

Now the question is, how did it get to this point? What could be wrong?

Well, the truth is dealing with human beings can be hard especially when love is involved. Sometimes, I like to see things this way, everything that exists, do exist in some measure, but when it comes to human feelings and love, it just can’t be measured or reduced to numbers.  In other words, we cannot measure the way we feel using numbers.

When you madly love someone the last thing you expect is to entertain doubts about the strength of your bond. Nevertheless, during times like this, those thoughts come at random and they just never feel right.

Going through a phase like this can be hard, and in most cases walking away becomes an option and when we leave we try to defend ourselves with this popular saying “there are many fishes in the river.”

However, we fail to remember that it is also popularly said that the devil you know is better than the angel you don’t know”.  On the other hand, this makes your situation seem a little tough as it ties you down to your current situation, sometimes leaving you with hopes that things will get better with time.  Do they ever get better?

Well, welcome to one of the crazy sides of love, which brings you to a different world full of experience and lessons. Nonetheless, how would you handle things if you find yourself in such situation. would you rather make things work? If yes, how would you? Or would you rather consider moving on?  How do you plan to prioritize your happiness at times like this?

 

8 thoughts on “Dealing with mixed feelings in a relationship

  1. In my own opinion, approaching your partner in a subtle way to talk about what’s going on will be best. But if the explanation he/she gives you is not reasonable enough, for love’s sake, give the relationship one last shot. If it still isn’t working, my candid advice will be that you walk away. If you decide to stay, you’ll be overwhelmed with a feeling of dissatisfaction and it tends to make you feel the same way about every other thing in life. Walking away is not easy, but it’ll go a long way in stabilizing your life. You don’t have to feel guilty, walk away knowing that you did all you could to make things work.

  2. Said it all.. Insecurity is the worse thing that can happen in a relationship but the best and most difficult solution is to simply walk out.. “He that is down fears no fall”. In a relationship, you should be “APPRECIATED” and not ” TOLERATED”

  3. The spark is key..we need to know how to get around reviving what was once burning at the start that suddenly went too deem..

      1. You see,
        during the course of each relationship, things begin to wear off, things between each other becomes cold, major reason is probably because they’ve been doing same routine all day everyday probably for the past 6 months or so..,
        Now in order to spice things up and make things look or feel more spicy, certain things needs to be done which haven’t been done before in the course of the relationship.. thereby rekindling the spark that’s in between them both..

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