As humans we get hurt or betrayed by the people we call ‘our own,’ our loved ones, our friends and our family, and sometimes letting go of the grudges and bitterness could seem impossible. This is because we hold still to the pain, anger, resentment and even the thought of revenge. Most of us are victims of this even though we might not all admit.

I Must admit I am a victim of this; I have been hurt couple times by the ones I thought I loved and trusted, even by family. There were a couple of times when all I wanted was revenge. I remember how much I needed to punch a few of them, that is if it would have made me feel better.

Forgiveness is such a powerful word, essential for growth, and a vital tool to cleanse karma. Let me ask you a question. Do you find it easy to forgive without considering the gravity of the action?

As a Christian, I was taught to forgive everyone and anyone that offends me, yet at some point in my life, my ‘reality’ found that hard to achieve.

My parents never failed to encourage forgiveness. My mom regularly used the famous saying “to err is human and to forgive is divine.” She would say this everytime she had to advise us regarding forgiveness. For my dad, he never seized to stress on the fact that forgiveness paves the way for peace, hope, gratitude, and joy. I would like to believe that we are aware of this, and that forgiving is key to living a peaceful and happy life.

Recently, I started practicing forgiveness a lot more, but I must say, It has been a struggle. I can’t deny that. Sometimes, It almost seemed as though forgiving some people can be impossible. This is because the gravity of their action did hurt so much, and the pain attached has become a burden to my soul. Have you ever experienced this?

Well, to let go of the burden of pain or anger I started some new steps to achieve forgiveness. First, is what I identify as self -reflection. Here, I examine the fact that my action might intentionally, or sometimes unintentionally hurt others. I can’t quantify how much I have hurt others, or maybe how much I have caused pain to others. So, to get forgiven, I have to forgive others.

Secondly, I try to have a good dialogue with anyone who might have offended or hurt me. I try to explain my point of view in the light of their actions.

Finally, I try to hold no grudge or anger. Now, this is where the hard part comes to play. It is easier said than done. Forgiveness could be easy if only you can open your mind to it but it is hard to forget. As I said, this journey has been a struggle.

Do you think it is easy to forgive and forget? Share your thoughts, experiences, and tips on forgiveness, and I am looking forward to embracing new ideas and learning new steps.

4 thoughts on “The act of forgiveness

  1. I forgive easily in the past like I Dnt care, I move on but when you are Bn hurt consistently by same person or people it’s hard to forgive. I may struggle a little bit but at the end, I just have to forgive not becos they deserve it Buy because I choose happiness

  2. Forgiveness comes from within, if someone close to you hurts you I think is easier to forgive, but forgetting is really pushing the limits. Humans are like machines that learn from mistakes and adjust their unconscious behaviours to adapt to mistakes from the past. Forgetting is somewhat impossible because we don’t really control our subconscious, it’s just based on the laws of natural human instincts.

  3. It is painful when someone you trust offends you.A deeper Love for christ and his word makes the difference.You discover you live for Christ and not man so anything it takes to please him will be your desire including forgiving your offenders.Also unforgiveness is a poison that can limit our increase and breakthrough in life and also stand as a hindrance to make eternity as no one knows when the trumpet will sound.Shalom.

  4. I think I could be the worse out there when it comes to forgiveness. But I realized something spectacular about act of forgiveness. When we forgive genuinely those who hurt or offend us, it immediately feels like a heavy burden has been lifted from our entire being. I must confess it’s one of the most beautiful few feelings I’ve experienced. Sometimes ago I was living in and with the idea that holding grudges or snubbing our offenders made one look strong. But in recent times it took my being forgiven to realize that a person who forgives easily is one of the strongest person alive. Personally, I still struggle with forgiving people that hurt me but it gets easier when I’m able to put myself in the offender’s shoe, realizing that I’d probably want to be forgiven. And then, not also forgetting our ultimate paradigm of forgiveness, God. It’s easier for some and hard for others, but I think what’s most important is the readiness and willingness to forgive in spite of the hurts. Now about forgetting wrongs done to us, in my opinion it doesn’t mean erasing it off your memory, beacause that’ll be nearly impossible because we are humans and our brains are stronger and more retainable than that of computers. What I see as the “forgetting” is the ability to think on those wrongs without the former hatred, resentment and other hard feelings that initially surrounded the wrongs being done to us.

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